Sunday 30 November 2008

The Tao of Edge

(Being Present and in the Moment)

Being present is consciousness liberated from thought forms.
It is total freedom from the known...
The masks are off!

A large component of natural game is being able to turn off the voice in your head (i.e. monologue /mental noise). This voice complains, comments, likes, dislikes, judges and compares. It is the voice which talks you out of approaching women or makes you nervous and persuades you to leave a conversation early. This mindset makes a guy see the present through the eyes of the past or imagine negative outcomes in the future. This is the Tao. And this has been particularly key to my progress.

Have no pick-up lines or routines in your mind! In my best assessment, people who believe they fundamentally lack something and need to compensate with 'material' or ‘lines’ will not find understanding this easy at all.

I learned that whenever you are able to observe and watch your mind, you are no longer trapped inside it. The moment you realise you have not been present, you become present. But the instant your conscious attention sinks below a certain level or the outer world intrudes, thought rushes in. The words crawl in, the stillness is lost and you have a snap moment! You are back to being in a zombified state. This is best exemplified I believe after sex, where the physical sensations/orgasms are finished by a CLICK moment.

This energy can be tapped into in pick-up. Approach anxiety or quick ejection from talking to a hot babe is caused by the same thing; by not being in the moment. Unfortunately sometimes we start to talk ourselves out of approaching or start to leave. So thought creates an interval which is time and time waits for no one. All you have to do is take action before you can think of a way to fuck it up...

In this instance if you are thinking when you want to approach a woman, you usually do one of 3 things:


1) Think about all the times you've been rejected- Past
(Every emotional pain leaves behind a residue of pain that lives on in you. Anything can trigger it, even an innocent remark)

2) Think about how it is going to go with ‘mental movies’ - Future
(Avoid. The quality of your consciousness at this moment is what shapes the future and usually the future is a replica of the past/present)

3) Your body freezes, your heart pumps very hard, you feel weak in your knees etc.
(These are the physical sensations which everyone can relate to in some manner when thinking about it too hard)



The above can be avoided by entering the present from wherever you are. As long as you are in a state of intense presence, you are free of thought. You are still, yet highly alert. You have full access to the best parts of your personality and your sub communication will take care of everything. If you can just become intensely conscious of the present moment and find the off button, you will find stillness and peacefulness to break through the approach. This is natural game in full force. It is true relationship.

Such 'presence’ is like being trapped with a poisonous snake in a small room; you watch its every movement, you are very, very sensitive to the slightest sound and hiss it makes. You are aware of the silent presence of each thing and to the danger but there is no new thought. Such a state of attention is total energy; in such awareness the totality of yourself is revealed in an instant.

This does astonishing things for your ability to relate to other people and socialise comfortably. It will be reflected in your body language; women can see from your pupils that you didn’t retract into your head. All people just want to be on the receiving end of this authentic communication.


Pulp Fiction Example:

Then the first of an uncomfortable silence happens.

MIA
Don't you hate that?

VINCENT
What?

MIA
Uncomfortable silences. Why do we
feel it's necessary to yak about
bullshit in order to be
comfortable?

VINCENT
I don't know.

MIA
That's when you know you found
somebody special. When you can
just shut the fuck up for a minute,
and comfortably share silence.


There is a brief and elusive glimpse of ‘no mind’ whenever there is a gap in the stream of mind. Think of a time with someone when there is an emotionally tense moment – e.g. after an argument or after a conversation where you reveal something particularly vulnerable about yourself. There is moment of electricity, followed by a silence, where you both look at each other. You see each other in a different light and share a rare form of communication. There are no longer 2 minds interacting with each other. There is a flash of insight which leads to the destruction of all the prejudices and images you created which block the true relationship.

If you really want to exercise these muscles and become present, ask yourself questions when reading this. Do I really know the people I am talking to? What is really going on and what is this person really like? E.g. does my congressman secretly get whipped by his mistress?

The easiest way to get out of your head is to get into someone else’s. I suggest that the way out of your head and into the moment is to place all of your attention on the other person. In order to un-stifle yourself - See yourself in all people..

The only peace you find in an interaction with a woman is the peace you bring with you.

Inner Game is King.

Michael - NYC
~THE EDGE

No comments: